Mysterious Ways

Alright, so yesterday I was engaged in a conversation with a friend in regards to someone we follow on Facebook. If y’all don’t know who Chris Crocker is, I would strongly advise looking up his videos. A lot of them are really funny and we both get a big kick out of how sassy he is. Lately, things have taken a rather dramatic turn for him and he’s getting some backlash over his decision to have some cosmetic procedures done. Because of that, he’s taken to making videos to call out the haters.

Yeah, he's the "Leave Britney alone!" guy who was having a total meltdown when Britney Spears was a decade ago.

Yeah, he’s the “Leave Britney alone!” guy who was having a total meltdown when Britney Spears was a decade ago.

So my friend and I were discussing how close we were close to unfollowing his page until the bullshit blows over. I don’t like getting caught up in internet drama. It’s silly and a pretty big waste of time, in my humble opinion.

Over the years I’ve had to learn to deal with people who are nasty to me because they can be. They can hide behind an anonymous review and say hateful things for no reason other than they feel entitled to it. Learning how to deal with that negativity isn’t easy. It’s one of the risks I take by posting the things I post. I had to come to accept that not everyone is going to love everything I do and I can’t make everyone happy. Sometimes a negative reaction is a good thing, depending on the reason why it’s negative.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not victim blaming here. What I am saying is that writers, entertainers, bloggers, vloggers and anyone else who put themselves or their product out there has to take responsibility and own the things they post or present. If someone throws shade at you, so be it. No one likes it (except the drama queens, but this post isn’t for you lol), but it’s part of making yourself a public figure. You have to expect that at some point someone is going to have something vile or downright nasty to say to you.


How you choose to handle it is up to you. Chris has chosen to clap back through videos and comments on those videos. I don’t know if I agree with what he’s doing, but that’s his choice. He needs to handle it how he needs to handle it. It’s my decision whether or not I choose to stick around and watch. I’d like it if he just let it go, but that’s not up to me.

So then this morning, just as I’m about to get in the shower after my yummy breakfast of cinnamon vanilla pancakes with blueberries on the side, I get an email. I swear, it’s like the Lord is testing me on the things I said to my friend yesterday. I got a scathing, mean review from some anonymous person on the first chapter of Full of Grace (which was nominated as an all-time favorite story in this year’s Fanatic Fanfics Multifandom Awards, by the way).


Immediately I spammed the review because I’m not the type of author who needs to have my friends go harass someone for me. The drama is unnecessary, in my opinion. I’m just too old for that shit.

Once the shock wore off over what was said, I contemplated email this person back because WordPress gives a commenter’s email and IP address to the owner of the blog every time they comment. It wasn’t an email address I recognized, nor a screen name. So I have no clue who this person might be. Regardless of all that, I went through several drafts of things to say to this person, but deleted them all.

Why? Well, because I decided that this person, whoever they are, has already made up their mind about me. Frankly, I don’t give a fuck what they think of me. This person knows nothing about me. They chose one story, read one chapter, and decided they had me all figured out. Okay. Cool story, bruh.


I thought about the things that I just got done saying about how Chris was handling haters and I decided I had a choice. So I took screenshots of the nasty review that was sent to me, and I forwarded them to Missy, Wifey, and my friend I was talking to yesterday, who we’ll just call Mrs. Dixon (ol’ girl has the biggest crush on Norman Reedus ever). My initial thought was revenge, because that would be so much better than emailing them, cussing them out.

Instead, after talking with Mrs. Dixon and Missy I came to another conclusion. Missy suggested I email my new Annie Wilkes with the lyrics to Eminem’s “Puke“, but I don’t need that person having my email address. Mrs. Dixon, on the other hand, suggested I reply with Taylor Swift lyrics. Now, I don’t know too many Taylor Swift songs. I kind of make it a point not to. But as soon as she mentioned Taylor, something popped in my head. It made me laugh, which, in turn, made me feel better about this garbage heap of a situation.

So rather than hating on this person who had nothing better to do today than be mean to me, I’m going to dedicate this in their honor. Wherever you are, I hope you’re having a wonderful day.




Farewell Fanfiction

No, I’m not retiring. You can breathe.

I am, however, bidding a fond farewell to Why? Well, there are several reasons. Primarily that I just don’t post there anymore. I don’t see the point of keeping that account open when it’s really pretty useless to me. I don’t get reviews there very often anymore. Usually I get PMs from random people bitching at me because their links suck and don’t reroute people here.

So to save myself the headache of those messages, buh bye. I know, I know, but Meg you could just turn off PMs. Yes, that’s true. I could turn off the PMs. It still doesn’t change the fact that I don’t post there. I haven’t posted there in well over a year at this point. It’s more like two, possibly three.

Additionally, and I this is where I had a bit of a struggle, I don’t want to deal with FFN admins, stories being pulled, or that massive thundercunt who has been trolling just about everyone I love in this community. I know, we’re not supposed to let the terrorists win. The thing is, I’m fresh out of fucks to give about that.

See? Eric gets me.

The simple truth is, I don’t want to deal with the shit. If that means I close the account I don’t use anyway, so be it. This troll is going to continue to push its agenda regardless. It’s targeting a blog that isn’t even on that site so…

Like dumbass trolls who try police a website’s policies with examples from a completely different website that has nothing to do with the other one. Fuckwit.

So that’s my decision. I am currently working on pulling everything down. I’m sad to lose all of the wonderful reviews I have gotten over the years. Well, I have them all saved in my email. My inner hoarder likes that they’re all organized on FFN, even if I never go back and read them. They’re just little reminders of good times and some not so good.

But for those of you think the troll is surviving all of this unscathed, that is not the case. Wifey alerted me to some shit going down so I took a little looksie purely out of curiosity. What? I’m a bitch who likes gossip. Sometimes. What I found was this (a report from the Anti-Plagiarism Reports Forum) and this (a growing list of stories that It has reported for elimination). I’m a little offended that the only story of mine to make the cut was a cowrite with Scribeninja. I know I have way more smut than that to offer.

Based on what I read in the comments (not that I want to drive Its traffic up over there) legal action is being taken against this person for the plagiarism. Obviously the admins over there are not too thrilled with the Troll’s decision to plagiarize in some feeble attempt to make a point about rule breaking by breaking rules. It’s hypocrisy at its finest and it succeeded in getting approximately zero stories removed from the site, at least as far as I know. Help Me Remember will be leaving by my choice and not some nazi admin’s.

So that’s it. I’m done with

That said, I am going to do my best to get everything posted here but it’s a time consuming thing to do. It’ll be a work in progress like everything else in my life. I’ll do the best I can.

You’re all beautiful and I adore you.



I’m Having A Quandry

Okay so it was brought to my attention by RedJane12 that a one shot I co-wrote with Missy Dee for our Dirty Lemons page had been plagiarized by this lovely NO MA ALLOWED person. My gut reaction was to tell her I wasn’t going to bother clicking the link she had provided for me that would allow me to see exactly what was going on. I was good. I didn’t click the link and I didn’t get involved. I figured I don’t need that kind of frustration and nothing I say is going to stop a troll from trolling. The more attention you feed a troll, the trollier it gets.

But then yesterday my curiosity got the better of me. I decided I could go and take a look just to see what all the fuss was about. It was also brought to my attention that Angela was on the list of smut writers he/she had targeted for public stoning and had referred to her as a “dead smutty bitch” or something of that nature. It could have been “smutty dead bitch”. Either way, that didn’t sit well with me at all. I wasn’t close to Angela but we did trade comments back and forth, both on our works and on Facebook. From what I can tell, she was a very nice woman with a fantastic sense of humor. Regardless of whether or not I was a die hard fan of hers, I respected her work and the time/effort she put into it. Her death was tragic in many ways and for someone to make light of that… I just couldn’t abide it.

What can I do about it? Nothing. By the time I got to check out NO MA ALLOWED’s profile, he/she had already changed it to remove that little bit of nastiness. The excerpt from Little Red Wagon had been removed from her page and in place of the stories that had been plagiarized were “author’s notes”, ironically also against the policy of but apparently rules don’t apply to trolls.

I must be getting mellow in my advancing age because what I saw in those notes didn’t make me angry like they might have even a year or two ago. What I saw there made me actually kind of sad. I don’t know the backstory behind this person or what caused them to lash out so badly at people they don’t even know for reasons that don’t make a whole lot of sense, but it’s pathetic. I suppose living in a country where there are mass shootings almost on a daily basis makes you put things in perspective. I have bigger fish to fry than what some troll thinks about internet smut.

Purely out of a need to feed my own curiosity I went to look at the “reviews” that were left behind. Not too surprisingly, a lot of them were guest reviews. Some of them were sarcastic and biting; some threatened to report the troll for their violation of TOS; some were downright vulgar and offensive. There were few comments that were worded kindly and attempted to be nice to a person who, quite honestly, doesn’t seem to have much kindness in their heart.

The reviews I saw made me sad. I know, I know, a lot of people would probably say she doesn’t deserve kindness or to be treated nicely. I’m not going to judge the people who left anonymous reviews calling her a cunt or telling her she needs to get laid to “fuck the bitch out of her”. I’m no one’s mother and we’re all adults here. At least we should be. If you’re under eighteen and reading smut on the internet, there’s nothing I can do to stop you. But I digress… The reviews made me sad. Why? Well, there’s a part of me that would like to think we’re better as a fandom than to stoop to her level of name calling and childishness. There’s also the possibility that you win over more flies with honey than vinegar but trolls are rarely won over and I know that.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a few choice words for her myself. What I was surprised by was that I didn’t want to log in and leave her a rant in defense of my work. I didn’t want to leave some snarky guest comment that said, “Fuck you and the dick you rode in on.” Instead, I looked to see who was on her hit list. I recognized a lot of those names. A lot of those authors are women that I have become friends with. We send Christmas cards, birthday presents, Skarsporn, help each other’s kids with school projects because we live in different parts of the country and we talk about our lives outside of fanfiction. These women have become a fantastic resource in my writing and also personally.

I was more hurt by this than I was angry. In case it’s gone unnoticed over the years, I don’t like to see my friends being attacked by others. Maybe it’s my Mother Hen Complex or the Taurus in me that gets all fired up and ready to stampede any fool unfortunate enough to wake the sleeping bull inside me. I don’t know if that list is sitting on her profile because she thinks it’s going to bring shame to the writers who are on it, but I can tell you now – and I’m fairly certain I speak for all of the authors on it – that they are fresh out of fucks to give. All of my fucks are tied up in other things.

Thinks that matter. You know, like gun control, women’s rights, the incredible fuck up that is our healthcare system in America, climate change, homeless veterans, starving children… the list goes on and on and on. I simply don’t have any fucks to spare for this person who had decided that internet smut is the best use of her energy and voice. I’m more concerned about cyber bullying and the posting of revenge porn than a group of authors who are writing imaginary porn. Maybe I just have my priorities straight? I don’t know.

In the end, I’m sticking by my decision not to feed the troll. I read Wifey’s fic response to Marie Antoinette and while it made me laugh, I’ve decided I’m not going to waste my time or energy dedicating work to her. What will it accomplish? A year ago it might have made me feel better. Now I’m just kinda shrugging it off and getting on with my day.

Before I go, though, I do want to say thank you to those that jumped up in our defense. I can’t speak for all of the writers out there but I know  for me your support is greatly appreciated. Your encouragement, reviews and sometimes your publicity mean the world to me. I would write no matter what but it is positively wonderful to be able to engage with the readers and answer their questions when they have them. That’s something that professional writers don’t always get to do. I feel incredibly blessed that so many people have continued to follow my work and grow with me in the time that I have been in the fandom. Sometimes I think I take it for granted.

I’m an old timer now. I looked at that list and some of those names I didn’t even recognize. It’s been a long time since I’ve published anything on and for good reason. Hell, not a single word from Dirty Lemons has ever been published over there and yet we made the list. I guess that means we’re special, huh?




I Fail…

Anyone still out there? I know I promised a sequel to Dark Was the Night a few months ago. Things got insane at work. I wrote more about it on my personal blog if you’re interested in reading about that shizz. If you’re not, just please be patient with me. There’s only so many hours in a day and I’m a chick who likes her sleep.

I also realized the other day that I have been a part of this fandom for about six years now. The fact that I still have things to write for these characters is kind of amazing. I owe a lot of that to the music I listen to, the tv shows I watch and even just every day situations going on around me. It also helps that I have made some wonderful friends through this fandom and they are fantastically encouraging and sometimes in the kick in the ass I need. I’m not as active on Twitter as I used to be, or on tumblr, for that matter. I simply haven’t had the time.

I backed away, in part, because I realized that there were people I thought I could trust and they just ended up throwing shade when they thought I wasn’t looking. It’s petty, in my opinion. I don’t need to tear someone else down to make myself feel better about my choices. I don’t need to post thinly veiled blog entries, patting myself on the back for all the changes I’ve made in my life while taking subtle jabs at other people. Some people need that kind of validation and reassurance, I guess. I realize just how hypocritical that entire paragraph is. I just needed to get that off my chest because it’s been bugging the shit out of me for a while now.


One last thing… I have an idea bouncing around in my brain that would sort of be an homage to the Buffy verse in the way it would be told, assuming I don’t royally fuck it up. I’ve been asked before why I don’t write Buffy fic and the answer is simple: I don’t think I could do those characters justice. It’s not to say that everything in the Buffy verse is absolutely beyond reproach, because there are definitely things I wish I could change about it, but the characters all have such unique voices I just don’t think I could speak for them as well as I would need to. I feel more comfortable in the SVM universe. The thing is, I’ll probably need a beta for this. Someone to keep my in line, as it were, preferably someone who is good at checking continuity and also understands the flow of the Buffy verse. So if anyone is interested in possibly taking on my crazy ass (and by crazy, I really mean I have attention deficit disorder with a mild case of mental hoarding, when it comes to writing), please feel free to drop me a comment here and I’ll be more than happy to email you back.

For anyone who bothered to read through all of this and is anxious to see me post anything new, thank you for hanging in there. I appreciate any and all encouragement I get. It really means a lot to me.


Completed Stories Available For Downloading

Hello lovelies!

So thanks to Storiesforevy putting her stories up for download, I am now converting my stories to PDF and Mobi files so they can be downloaded. As of this post, I have only converted Over You and The Playground to Mobi format. I will take requests for others, so leave me a comment here on this post and I will get other stories formatted as time permits. I need to edit Hot For Teacher before anyone asks me for that, and it will take me a while to do since that story is 60 chapters long and I know it’s a hot mess.

This also applies to anything that I have written with Scribeninja, so if you’re interested in having any of the Brainmates stories, you can ask for those as well.

Get Over You here.

Get The Playground here.

I’ll be posting a new chapter of The Lengths either sometime later today or tomorrow.

Thanks for reading!


Just A Quick Note…

Okay so first of all, I love all of the speculation about Quinn possibly having something to do with Sadie’s disappearance. You guys are great coming up with theories. I can’t say if anyone has been correct so far in their assumptions, but I love hearing what you think. Clues have been dropped so we’ll see if anyone ends up being right in their thinking.

Secondly, because The Lengths is such a drag, I needed a bit of fluff in my life. I got an idea for a one shot and I started writing it but I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go with it. So I turned to my trusty brainmate and invited her to write with me. Of course it’s grown beyond a one shot and is becoming a little story of its own. Go figure. We’ll see when it starts posting, but hopefully we can knock it out over the weekend. Keep an eye out for a little story called Throwdown on the Brainmates blog.

Which brings me to the next Brainmates production that is set to go live soon. Scribe and I are just doing some editing to Ain’t No Grave, and then we’ll start posting that for you. We haven’t set a date yet but I’m going to say no later than June 16th. If you don’t know why that date is significant, why in the eff are you even following either one of us?

And finally, if you haven’t already noticed…

Storiesforevy is back!






I am so excited that she’s able to return to us because I know a lot of you have certainly missed her during her absence from our little fandom. Her stories are available for downloading and formatted to mobi so they’re perfect for your Kindle, assuming you have one. I’m not sure what format other e-readers take, but there’s always the Kindle app. I had to DL it to read “I Was Wrong” since I hadn’t read that one. So far, I’m in love.

It was fun getting her blog all set up for her and I’m thrilled that she’s so happy with it, so if you haven’t already, go follow her and say hi. I know she’s excited to be back as well.

As always, thanks for reading and I hope everyone has a kick ass weekend!


So It’s Monday Again…

And I actually remembered I’m supposed to post!


On a serious note for a second, I want to thank everyone that responded to last week’s post in regards to Scribe’s niece. She’s super psyched about all of the postcards coming her way. I appreciate everyone that’s “signed up” to be a part of this taking their time to do so. It’s super awesome of you, so thank you!


If you’re interested in finding out more about this check last week’s post for details. I would love to have the postcards here by March 25th because Scribe is coming up for a visit. This way I can send things back with her to give to her niece the next time she comes for a visit. It’s not too late to get in on this if you’re interested in being a part of this little pet project.

In other news, Scribe and I are almost finished with another story. Hopefully we’ll wrap it up this week so keep an eye out for a new story called “Over You” that we’ll be posting soon. I hope everyone has gone to vote for the Fangreader Awards. I’m nominated for a few of them, as are wifey and Missy Dee.

For those that haven’t seen her post, Missy Dee is currently on hiatus after having a stroke a few days ago. I can report that while feeling a little disoriented, she’s doing okay and will hopefully be released from the hospital tomorrow. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for her and she’s in my prayers.

And finally there’s the main event…

Crossed Out Name Chapter 8

Oh, and just for lolz, here’s my favorite gif this week:


You’re welcome!

Happy Tuesday!

Yes,  I know I’m late with this post again. I’ll make this quick for you.

I actually have a favor to ask. Scribeninja’s niece is all about geography and learning about the world. She’ll be six in March and she’s super awesome. I haven’t met her personally since I haven’t traveled to where Scribe lives, but I have spoken to my favorite little Troll Queen. She’s called me before. It’s actually kind of adorable. Anyway… she’s all about geography which I think is pretty awesome for a 5 year old and she’s trying to get people to send her things from around the world. Well, mostly just postcards or something like that. I’m sending her something from Chicago, my sister in Berlin is going to send something to her and Scribe/my internet friends are sending things from Scotland, England, Ireland, Australia, etc. You don’t have to be from outside the U.S. in order to participate, btw. She’s tracking everything she receives on a globe and on an internet map, so anything she gets she’s super excited to find on her maps.

If anyone is interested in making a little girl’s day and helping her learn about the world around her please contact me via email ( so I can give you information on where to send things. I’ll have you send what you want to me and then once I have everything I’ll package it up and send it all to her at once. It’ll be like Christmas for her, I guarantee it.

For those just interested in my writing, there’s this too…

Crossed Out Name Chapter 7

Have a great week!


I’m Late! I’m Late!

Yes, I know I was supposed to post on Monday. I meant to and then completely forgot to do it.  I could make a bunch of excuses but there isn’t much point. Anyway… the new chapter is up for reading so you can check that out.

I also found out yesterday that I have been nominated for three Fangreader Awards!!!

Two of them are for The Playground and one is for beta’ing Missy Dee’s story “What I Got“. How psyched am I, you ask? Very! Missy Dee was also nominated several times over for her various works in the past year and I will be shocked if she doesn’t moonwalk away with at least one award. Wifey was also nominated for “All In” and her secret story “Secrets That We Keep,” which is now no longer a secret.

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I am really proud of The Playground. Not just because it was so well received by so many readers, but because I finished it (if you follow me you know what a huge deal that is lol) but also because I took a risk in posting it. There are plenty of people that aren’t into reading a story that deals with that sort of subject matter and I knew I was running the risk of offending someone or making them roll their eyes with all of the BDSM stuff that’s been going around thanks to that fucked up trilogy which I shall not name. If you don’t know what I’m referring to, consider yourself lucky because I wish it would just go the fuck away already.

But anyway… I’m proud of the way that story turned out. It took a lot of research to be able to write it (and not just because of the kink). When I first started writing SVM fic a few years ago there is no way I could have written a story like this. I couldn’t even use the slang terminology I use now without getting all blushy faced and uncomfortable. So I’ve grown and evolved as a writer since then, and I’m excited about seeing that change in myself. So it means a lot to me that that particular story has been recognized.

Enough jibber jabber from me. If you’re interested in voting in this years awards please go here and do so. Help make some author’s day. Voting is open until April and the awards will be announced on May 4, 2013. It’s not official yet but I’m pretty sure kjwrit and I will be attending the awards together with our fantasy Skars between us. We’re already stocking up on Heineken and rainbow condoms for the after party.

And just in case you’re interested, here’s the new chapter of Crossed Out Name that should have gone up on Monday.

Crossed Out Name: Chapter 6

Have a great weekend, lovers xoxo