Mysterious Ways

Alright, so yesterday I was engaged in a conversation with a friend in regards to someone we follow on Facebook. If y’all don’t know who Chris Crocker is, I would strongly advise looking up his videos. A lot of them are really funny and we both get a big kick out of how sassy he is. Lately, things have taken a rather dramatic turn for him and he’s getting some backlash over his decision to have some cosmetic procedures done. Because of that, he’s taken to making videos to call out the haters.

Yeah, he's the "Leave Britney alone!" guy who was having a total meltdown when Britney Spears was a decade ago.

Yeah, he’s the “Leave Britney alone!” guy who was having a total meltdown when Britney Spears was a decade ago.

So my friend and I were discussing how close we were close to unfollowing his page until the bullshit blows over. I don’t like getting caught up in internet drama. It’s silly and a pretty big waste of time, in my humble opinion.

Over the years I’ve had to learn to deal with people who are nasty to me because they can be. They can hide behind an anonymous review and say hateful things for no reason other than they feel entitled to it. Learning how to deal with that negativity isn’t easy. It’s one of the risks I take by posting the things I post. I had to come to accept that not everyone is going to love everything I do and I can’t make everyone happy. Sometimes a negative reaction is a good thing, depending on the reason why it’s negative.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not victim blaming here. What I am saying is that writers, entertainers, bloggers, vloggers and anyone else who put themselves or their product out there has to take responsibility and own the things they post or present. If someone throws shade at you, so be it. No one likes it (except the drama queens, but this post isn’t for you lol), but it’s part of making yourself a public figure. You have to expect that at some point someone is going to have something vile or downright nasty to say to you.

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How you choose to handle it is up to you. Chris has chosen to clap back through videos and comments on those videos. I don’t know if I agree with what he’s doing, but that’s his choice. He needs to handle it how he needs to handle it. It’s my decision whether or not I choose to stick around and watch. I’d like it if he just let it go, but that’s not up to me.

So then this morning, just as I’m about to get in the shower after my yummy breakfast of cinnamon vanilla pancakes with blueberries on the side, I get an email. I swear, it’s like the Lord is testing me on the things I said to my friend yesterday. I got a scathing, mean review from some anonymous person on the first chapter of Full of Grace (which was nominated as an all-time favorite story in this year’s Fanatic Fanfics Multifandom Awards, by the way).

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Immediately I spammed the review because I’m not the type of author who needs to have my friends go harass someone for me. The drama is unnecessary, in my opinion. I’m just too old for that shit.

Once the shock wore off over what was said, I contemplated email this person back because WordPress gives a commenter’s email and IP address to the owner of the blog every time they comment. It wasn’t an email address I recognized, nor a screen name. So I have no clue who this person might be. Regardless of all that, I went through several drafts of things to say to this person, but deleted them all.

Why? Well, because I decided that this person, whoever they are, has already made up their mind about me. Frankly, I don’t give a fuck what they think of me. This person knows nothing about me. They chose one story, read one chapter, and decided they had me all figured out. Okay. Cool story, bruh.

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I thought about the things that I just got done saying about how Chris was handling haters and I decided I had a choice. So I took screenshots of the nasty review that was sent to me, and I forwarded them to Missy, Wifey, and my friend I was talking to yesterday, who we’ll just call Mrs. Dixon (ol’ girl has the biggest crush on Norman Reedus ever). My initial thought was revenge, because that would be so much better than emailing them, cussing them out.

Instead, after talking with Mrs. Dixon and Missy I came to another conclusion. Missy suggested I email my new Annie Wilkes with the lyrics to Eminem’s “Puke“, but I don’t need that person having my email address. Mrs. Dixon, on the other hand, suggested I reply with Taylor Swift lyrics. Now, I don’t know too many Taylor Swift songs. I kind of make it a point not to. But as soon as she mentioned Taylor, something popped in my head. It made me laugh, which, in turn, made me feel better about this garbage heap of a situation.

So rather than hating on this person who had nothing better to do today than be mean to me, I’m going to dedicate this in their honor. Wherever you are, I hope you’re having a wonderful day.

BLESS YOUR HEART.

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16 thoughts on “Mysterious Ways

  1. Not completely related: http://journals.cambridge.org/action/displayFulltext?type=6&fid=10293504&jid=APA&volumeId=-1&issueId=-1&aid=10293503&bodyId&membershipNumber&societyETOCSession&fulltextType=RA&fileId=S2053447716000099

    I do agree with the part about how there are people in a community who act like they are apart of it, but they’re not there to contribute. They’re only there to tear others down. They tend to get away with it often because they try to make their comments somewhere near the truth. Others, who spew mean things, do it behind some anonymous mask. It’s been said “don’t feed the trolls”. Very hard not to do, but I commend you for writing those responses and then deleting them. It always feels good to say what you need to say, even if you don’t send it to the person you’re saying it about.

    There was a great article where someone tracked down a vicious troll and the troll repented and said they did it because they could, and didn’t think about it. Because they felt badly about themselves. It’s good to know that even trolls can agree that this is the root of their behavior.

    • My favorite part of the review was when Annie Wilkes asked me if I was really that desperate for attention.

      Apparently the irony of such a question was lost on the person leaving a scathing review that was definitely designed to get attention. But whatevs…

      • I joined FF in January, so I don’t know many people. Also, see, I just discovered that I have a wordpress feed where people respond back to me! And here I’ve been waiting for email notifications. So that’s why this comment is so late!

  2. Girl you got the right mindset for not giving a f*ck about what haters have to say after reading only one chapter of a story. Your post made my day a whole lot more enjoyable, I’m happy that you defend yourself without coming across conceded and rude it was very creative.

    • Thank you. Being rude (which ALL of the deleted emails were) wouldn’t have solved anything. Really, thinking of The Rock lip syncing to Taylor Swift made it a lot harder for me to be mad anymore. This nonsense made me laugh too, so joke’s on Annie Wilkes. She can go peddle her hatorade somewhere else.

  3. I never understood that mentality…if I don’t like some story I start to read I just move onto another. Just don’t get why some people need to tear down others. I applaud the what you handled it though!

  4. I don’t know if it’s this age of social media or the onslaught of anonymity, but whatever happened to “If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all?” Seems the manners with which I was raised (and those with I raised my own “adult” children) have long disappeared, and people now strive to be as mean as possible, if only because they get away with it. I love the “Bless your heart.” Perfect! I applaud you not getting into verbal warfare with a virtual stranger, ultimately there are no winners. I feel your frustration, too. It seems there are more people like this every day. You handled it with grace, and that doesn’t surprise me! Keep doing what you do because you do it so well, Meg! 🙂

    • Thank you, my dear. Miss Miranda Lambert was running through my head at the end. “I don’t have to be hateful when I can just say bless your heart.” I love that song. Feeding trolls only gives them a sense of satisfaction and encourages them to continue to troll. Thanks, but no thanks.

      As for the advancements in social media, I am beyond thankful that I didn’t have to deal with it when I was a teenager. In this way, being 34 has its benefits.

      • You are very welcome! I’ve never heard that song, but what a great lyric! Yeah, I have a feeling that if social media in its current form had existed back in the 70’s when I still lived at home, it would have never been allowed in my parents home! I can just hear them now! LOL! I policed it plenty when my kids were still at home in the early years of this century. I don’t know much about it; my blogging on WP is as far as I get. Facebook is horrible, other than getting pictures of my grandkids! I guess it just missed you given that you’re 4 years older than my oldest, so you are fortunate! You must have actually left the house! 🙂

      • Well, during high school I was a total book nerd, but after graduation from about 18-25 I was hardly ever home.

        And this is the song I referenced. It’s called “Only Prettier”.

      • I was both a book nerd & partier, and the last place I ever wanted to be was home! Then I married young & moved to Green Acres…swore I’d never listen to country music again! LOL! Some of it’s not so bad now. Thanks for the link, I will check it out! I’ve heard great things about Miranda Lambert. She sounds very sassy, and I like that! 🙂

      • I love Miranda. She’s definitely my favorite female solo performer in country music. She’s definitely sassy. Maaaaaybe a little crazy, but I like that she’s got a little of that outlaw thing happening. Carrie Underwood is one I wouldn’t want to cross either. She looks so sweet but she’s got a lot of songs about getting away with murder.

      • LOL! They both sound great! Little crazy? Even better! I’ve heard a few of Carrie Underwood early songs, but the ones about getting with murder? LOL! Those are fun! I like the female performers who have fun & look like they really enjoy having a good time with all of it, and the little outlaw thing. They just seem to use a little more creativity than others.

  5. Ouch! You “Bless your heart”-ed them. Must have been bad.

    I don’t what drives people to behave so badly on the Internet. It’s ridiculous. You definitely had the right idea, you have to just ignore those people because they just feed off response. Just like every other bully.

    Your writing is fantastic. Enough said.

  6. I can understand that you were hurt. And I am pretty sure the person who wrote the comment meant to hurt you. Some people have no dignity. If I don’t like a story or a chapter, I just pass without any comment. I merely switch story or author. What I don’t like … may appeal someone else. But there is one thing I always keep in mind : the writer has devoted a lot of energy, imagination and free time to the story and this alone calls for respect. Heads up and keep on the good work. Love from Paris (France)

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